On Worth

Recently I’ve felt like I’m just going through the motions. Does anybody else think that too? I go to class, I do homework, I might work out if I can keep my eyes open, I eat something fast for dinner, I sleep. On weekends, I wake up before the sun, I nanny, I eat dinner, I sleep.

I just submitted my application to Public Health. The application that decides my whole future career. Its fine, I’m fine.

The application includes a 5 page interest statement explaining your career plans and your strengths and weaknesses as a student. Sitting in class listening to everyone talk about their applications and compare seriously irked me. The competition emerging from my fellow classmates was eye roll worthy. Registration for Fall 2016 classes is at the end of March and if results from Public Health aren’t announced in time, I have to sign up for classes like I was not accepted to the program. SO stressful, y’all. SO stressful.

Like I said, I just feel like I’m going through the motions and I’m stuck in this routine. I’m having a hard time seeing how all of my work now plays into my future – whether it be a week from now, a month, a year, five years. I found this:

The best things take time, and this quote really stood out to me. I might not be able to see the end of the tunnel right now, but I have to be satisfied with knowing that what I’m doing right now is adding up to what’s about to come.

[Tweet ” I might not be able to see the end of the tunnel right now, but I have to be satisfied with knowing that what I’m doing right now is adding up to what’s about to come.”]

I think that the feeling of being stuck in a routine sometimes translates over to self worth and feeling good enough. When everything you’re putting forth doesn’t seem to be adding up to well, anything, here’s how you can emerge out of the funk:

Write it down.

My favorite. If you’re into handwritten, grab a sheet of paper and a pretty pen and do a brain dump. If writing by hand isn’t your thing, open a google doc and start typing. Don’t correct spelling, don’t review to “see how it sounds,” just WRITE.

When I was struggling through my break up, I turned to an idea that I’ve heard over time and it helped a LOT. I wrote a letter to the guy. I didn’t correct spelling, I didn’t review to see if it sounded right, I just did it. I wrote down how I felt and what I would miss and what I thought about the relationship now and anything I could think of. My friend told me a little while ago about how her counselor recommended this same exercise when her parents were going through a rough spot, so I thought, “What do I have to lose?” I wrote his address on the front, wrote mine on the back, sealed it, and sent it.

Sent it to my desk drawer, that is. I sealed it and put it away and wow did that work wonders. I felt such a relief, such a weight off of my shoulders. Because the letter was tucked away, and because I sealed it, it truly felt like I had sent it off to him and I really got my closure from the relationship in that way. You might be wondering, “Okay, cool, you wrote a letter to your ex. How does that apply here?”

Well, my friend, how about writing a letter to you?

I’m serious. Just you.

Write everything down. Don’t you dare check for spelling. Don’t even think about reviewing to see how it sounds.

Write to yourself about your dreams and your career goals. Motivate yourself to never stopping working towards what you believe. Beg yourself to see the light at the end of the tunnel. Know that everything you’re doing is just part of a series. Great things are done by series. Love yourself and remind yourself of that. The writing process itself will heal and inspire in more ways that I can say.

[Tweet “Love yourself and remind yourself of that.”]

What’re you waiting for? Find some paper near you, grab a pen, and go.

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  • This is the time of year I really just feel like I’m going through the motions too. Never thought to write a letter to myself but sounds like a good idea. I’m a very visual person and things like that usually help me!

    How 2 Wear It [] http://how2wearit.com

    • Savannah Ward

      Morgan, I would definitely give writing a letter a try! You’ll instantly feel a weight off of your shoulders. Happy Wednesday!

  • Elana Lyn Gross

    I love this post! I find that even deviating from the usual a little can help. It can be as small as taking a different route to work or class, going to a new restaurant instead of your go-to, or going to a cafe to study or blog instead of the library or your couch. Also, great minds think alike! I had that same quote in my post today!

    • Savannah Ward

      You’re so right, Elana! I’m always looking for new ways to break from the norm. And HEY, that’s so funny! Loved your post too 🙂

  • The wonderful thing about chaos is that although they disturb us and make us uncomfortable, they also make our hearts roar in a way that is magnificent. It sounds like you’ve got a good head on your shoulders; I don’t doubt for one second that you’ll figure things out! And if not, then remember: None of us really know what we’re doing. We just like to pretend like we do. 😉

    • Savannah Ward

      You’re SO right, Oksana! What great words. Thank you so much for your support. Fake it until you make it, right? 😉

  • I always feel like I’m just going through the motions in the winter but sometimes the unknown can be thrilling too!


    • Savannah Ward

      I agree that its the winter that makes everything seem so blah. Thanks for reading! 🙂

  • This is incredible. I have utilized a similar approach through my last break-up and found it to be extremely soothing. I wrote a long, gut-wrenching letter to my ex and gave it to a dear friend who got rid of it for me. I felt so free afterwards. I’d love to harness that feeling in a positive way and look towards my future! Thanks for this post- it has great timing for me!

    • Savannah Ward

      The giving it to a friend idea is GREAT. I’ve never thought of that! I’m so glad you enjoyed the post. I hope you’re having a good week! 🙂

  • I get to feeling like this around this time of the year. Where I live it is so dreary and so little sun. You start to get feeling like you aren’t really fully functioning. Sometimes it just takes one nice day or fun activity to re-energize you again. Great post!

    • Savannah Ward

      I know, right? I’m counting down the days until Spring Break! Thanks for reading! 🙂

  • One of my all-time favorite Van Gogh quotes. And break-ups are just hard at any time of year. Kudos to you for having such a keen perspective on moving forward!

    Diary of a Debutante

    • Savannah Ward

      Thanks so much Stephanie! There were definitely some hard times the last couple of months but writing it all out was what I needed to gain clarity and get myself together. Happy Wednesday!

  • Linda Plourde

    This is such great advice. I have actually started typing out my feelings. I have not reread it, I just type. So helpful to my brain!

    • Savannah Ward

      Hey Grandma! Thanks so much for reading and commenting 🙂 I think typing out feelings is a great way to release some stress and pressure. I love you!

  • Sara Kate Steadman

    Isn’t it amazing how much writing helps! I started a journal at the beginning of the new year and it’s so amazing to see how much it helps to just channel all of that to paper and in essence get it out so you can move on.

    Sara Kate Styling

    • Savannah Ward

      That’s such a great idea! You’ll be super glad you started writing for sure. Happy Wednesday!

  • Lauren Ashley

    Sometimes I feel like I’m just going through the motions too. I was actually telling my mom that recently. I feel like I just do the same things every day and then just do it again the next day. Writing helps SO much for me, too. It really is the biggest form of therapy.

    The Fashionista’s Diary

    • Savannah Ward

      Hey Lauren! I tell my mom that all of the time 😛 They’re the best listeners!

  • This is so great Savannah! When I went through my rough break up around his time 4 years ago, I wrote it ALL down I wrote so much down, I wrote so many different feelings and emotions down. I wrote and wrote and wrote but never read it, at least not then. I poured myself a glass of wine and opened it a year ago and laughed so hard at some of the things I wrote. Writing is such a great way to get all of your emotions out!

    • Savannah Ward

      Hey Tiffani! Thanks so much for reading 🙂 Your story is so funny! In high school my bf and I wrote notes to each other when we weren’t “allowed” to hang out and I cry I laugh so hard when I read the letters. Oh, young love, right? 😉

  • I often feel like I’m just going through the motions. I’ve been doing much better lately on stopping and taking the moment in. Great post Xoxo Mindy

    • Savannah Ward

      Hey Mindy! Its great that you’ve been practicing mindfulness recently. Living in the moment helps so much!

  • Allison Ellzey

    Love love love this!

    • Savannah Ward

      Thank Allison! Happy Monday!