I Was the Kind of Kid Who…

> introduced new fashion trends at an early age

> tried my very, very hardest to be a horse girl.

> hated princesses and loooooOOOooved villains. My mom went to the Disney Store one day to ask if I was going to grow up alright. They offered expert advice and said I was going to be fine.

> ate ketchup straight out of the packet.

> fought to be the person to make everyone laugh. Always.

> cried in fourth grade because this shithead next to me decided to take my lucky pencil. It was LUCKY!!! It was red with white dolphins. Didn’t stop crying until he gave it back. I’ll never forgive him. You know who you are.

> wore braces for almost three freakin’ years. And hated every single day of those almost three freakin’ years.

> refused to move out from in front of the video camera at family events. To keep my act long and entertaining, I’d quote Willy Wonka until I ran out of breath and dad got annoyed and just starting filming something else.

> dressed up in bonnets and aprons and lived like I was on a prairie with my BFF in elementary and middle school. We hung laundry on a line, fed her horses with silver tin buckets, wore tall boots and dresses even when it was dangerously hot outside…the whole shabang.

> hid Harry Potter and The Chamber of Secrets in the drawer to the left of my sink in my bathroom because I thought the basalisk would pop out with Tom Riddle. And I knew I didn’t have a fancy phoenix, so I was screwed.

> said, “Jesus Christ is with me in this room right now so you should get the heck out!!!!!” when I was by myself in my dark and scary bed at night and I sensed something was there. Big-Eared Bunny, who sat on top of my pillow for night watch, didn’t really help me all that much. I was pissed.

> wore a Jessie the Cowgirl costume for like, 4 years in a row, because who the hell doesn’t love Jessie the Cowgirl?

> loved Disney World like nobody will ever be able to love Disney World. And I still do.

> collected Webkinz. I eventually had more than 15 and my parents decided an intervention was the right move. Or maybe I just decided 7th grade was too old for them. I don’t know.

> couldn’t tie my shoes until third grade

> or skip until second. I had better things to worry about, okay?




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  • That is awesome! You were and still are the best version of you! I love that you’ve always know who you were. You antics made me giggle. Thanks for sharing!

    • swraex@gmail.com

      Thanks so much for reading and commenting! Hope you have a great weekend!